Why Do Foster Parents Quit?
The first time you mentioned to a friend or family member that you were interested in becoming a foster parent, you may have met a long list of reasons not to do it. These concerns can be valid - nearly half of foster parents nationwide quit in the first year.
Your hope is that these situations never happen for you, but it is important to consider the risks involved and why some of these challenges exist. At Savio, we go the extra mile to make sure your experience is what you hope it will be.
Here are the top 3 reasons foster parents quit, and how we can prepare you and your family to be successful:
1 - They underestimate the impact of the child’s trauma:
Few people would disagree that a child’s parents are the most important people in the world to them. Consider what happens when they lose that - losing a parent is the most traumatic event a child can experience. This experience, no matter how traumatizing the home may have been, will interfere with a child’s normal development and functioning.
Children cope and react to their trauma in different ways - some healthy and some unhealthy. Often, this includes behaviors that may seem too young for their chronological age, even if they are developmentally on track in every other way.
Our foster parents tell us that it is best to adjust your expectations about how that child should behave and start your parenting from a place of working to understand how to meet the children where they are. The good news is that, like any child, foster children are not bad kids by nature - and trauma can be addressed through treatment and support in a safe environment. To make sure that you’re as prepared as you can be to support the youth placed in your home, Savio provides free trainings that will help you gain the skills to parent in these situations.
2- They don’t have the support they need
We are regularly contacted by foster parents who have previous foster experience outside of Savio. One thing that we hear consistently is that in their previous experience, there were times where they felt like they were fostering alone.
At Savio, we never want you to feel like you are alone, and this is the driving cause behind Savio providing extensive support for foster parents and youth. This includes:
24-hour support line, giving foster families access to our deeply experienced staff at any time it’s needed
Free pre-certification trainings for future foster parents
A continuum of care under the Savio umbrella to keep treatment under the same agency when possible
Online and in-person foster family support groups
3 - Confusion about the role of foster parents.
Foster care is designed to be a short-term solution, as Savio recognizes the research that shows that when possible, the best place for any child is to be at home with their family as soon as it is deemed a safe and healthy environment. While they are in foster care, children need love, stability, and safety while also having support in their love for their family of origin and care and understanding that the process of returning to them can involve a rollercoaster of emotions.
This is a crucial role in helping the child and their family reunite. Our foster care families create space in their homes and their lives for these children, who benefit greatly from consistency, caring, patience and support of both the youth themselves, but also of the parents to an extent in the foster family’s communication with the biological parents. The impact on both the youth and the family can be profound. This important role is valued and foster parents need to be viewed as important partners.
Unfortunately, too often foster parents feel left out of informing important decisions that are being made about the child. Savio recognizes this important role, and not only strives to build strong relationships with each of its foster families but also strives to ensure that you always have a seat at the table.